I don’t know anyone who doesn’t know a woman who got divorced.
It’s a fact of life now.
Often you see that woman transform and grow after the divorce. Maybe she becomes more outgoing, more social, goes out more. She changes her hair style, hair color, the way she dresses, loses weight, gets into yoga and working out etc. She starts a business or changes career.
I wonder why she didn’t or wouldn’t or couldn’t do or become those things with her ex. Was it her ex? Was it the marriage? Was he holding her back? Did she carry all the burdens of running the house and raising children (if they have children)? Was he mean to her? Indifferent to her? Did he neglect her? Was he a workaholic? Did her opinions, wants, needs, desires matter? Did they or she get too comfortable? Did they or she accept that’s all she could be and do? Did they or she stay or stay that way for the kids? Was she too challenged by him? Was she not challenged enough by him? Did she get scared or nervous or anxious? If yes, why? About what? Did she not get or was she not given the things (time, money, energy) she needed to grow?
Marriage with your husband is supposed to be the “place” where you and he and the relationship all grow, you grow and get better, he grows and gets betters and you do it together so the marriage grows and changes with you two and gets stronger and better and more intimate over time.